Thursday, January 5, 2012

Cheating Don't Lie

What makes a person cheat on their spouse, or significant other? Is it because they don't love them anymore but don't have the balls to end the relationship? Are they bored in the bedroom, and afraid to broach the subject for fear of rejection or ridicule? Were they cheated on and seeking revenge by doing what was done to them? Whatever the reason, there is no justification for infidelity, and although it's human nature to crave instant gratification, and make stupid mistakes, cheating tells the truth about a person and their relationship(s) and can't be undone.

In spite of all the variables that drive a person to infidelity, there should be some ground rules for creeping on your boo, and dealing with the fall out when you get caught, because you will get caught. First of all, if you are going to cheat, make sure it's with someone who is extremely dog ass ugly, and not nearly as attractive as the one you are cheating on. Why should this matter? From a woman's point of view it really doesn't matter, because she's going to be pissed off , but it can help ease her pain and suffering if she can tell hers friends that she herself is WAY prettier than that nasty ass skank ho her man hooked up with. Even if this is NOT the case at all, when you get caught, and you will, never reveal what your mistress really looks like (I'll explain later).,This gives a woman an easy out if she knows she can't compete because the other woman is a super model. That way the cheater victim can simply call the other woman a whore, and not factor in good looks . 
Women who cheat need to make sure their partner in crime is a broke ass bum, because men aren't that concerned about looks, but instead value their self worth based on their bread winning abilities. Nothing will crush a man's spirit quicker than learning that his beloved has left him for a man with a bigger bank account... size really does matter.

The next rather important rule of thumb when screwing around on and over your better half, is to take your dirty business AWAY from home and family. When your children run out the greet the mail man yelling daddy's home, you've gone too far. Trying to explain why Jr. so strongly resembles they UPS man isn't as easy as it sounds. Further more, no one wants to even think about another man/woman wallowing around in their bed, eating the groceries and watching the cable they pay for. That's just a slap in the face, and rightfully so, will cost you some serious alimony and earn you an ass whipping

The one thing that has always amazed me about cheating is just how emotionally damaging it can be, and the range of individual reactions that occur when the truth finally does come out. I can tell you from personal experience, that nothing hurts more, or can make you feel so dirty and used as finding out that the one person you completely trusted has destroyed the bond you share, not to mention shown a total disregard for your health and safety. Nothing destroys a relationship faster than disrespect, and cheating is the epitome of disrespect. So many times the victim of infidelity wants to blame the person their partner cheated with (hence the reason why you don't want to reveal your booty buddy's true identity), and yes if  that person willingly initiated a relationship with someone they knew was spoken for they are certainly at fault. But, the real fault lies with your spouse or significant other, because it is their duty to say NO in the first place, and that fact is why I just don't think a couple can recover from this major breach of loyalty and trust. Grudge sex is not the answer either, as that just puts you on the same level, making you just as big a cheater, if not bigger than the one who cheated on you!

So, the best advice I can give anyone about cheating on their mate is this... DON'T!!! Oh you can claim you have an open marriage/relationship, or pretend you don't know what's really going on, while everyone else knows your honey is buzzing with another bee, but in the long run cheating doesn't lie. Oh you can try to hang on as long as you think possible, but degrading yourself by clinging to a person who obviously doesn't care, and trying to carry a relationship that has run it's course will only bring you down even further. If you don't love someone anymore, end the relationship, and spare everyone involved the heartache and humiliation. It's the right thing to do, and you will feel better about yourself in the long run.. Unless, of course,  you are some nymphomaniacal pervert, who can't control your hormones, and have to screw around like a three balled tom cat. If that is the case, remain single and invest your time and money in large quantities of KY, carpal tunnel treatment, and unmarked packages wrapped in brown paper. You'll be doing the rest of society a huge favor.

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