When I look back at the five precious years I shared with my husband, it's the simplest things that stand out the most. Because Moe was a musician, music was naturally a huge part of our life, but even outside of his music career, we shared a great appreciation for all genres. Our mutual love for music was one of the common interests that bonded us, now it's what will always hold Moe close to my heart.
When I really take time to linger over some of the most important, and prized memories of our marriage, I can always find a song to accompany those events, a piece of music that encompasses the moment and preserves it in time for me. Like Trisha Yearwoods, "The Song Remembers When", I can hear certain songs on the radio, or play them at home, and once again I'm with Moe rolling along some wooded back road, high up in the Rockies, or snuggling on a front porch swing at a secluded cabin in the mountains of Tennessee. Faithfully by Journey takes me back to crowded clubs where Moe would catch my eye, as he sang those lyrics to me and only me, and tell me he loved me from the stage, with sign language he created just for us. Blake Shelton, or Michael Buble` singing Home puts me back in Moe's arms slow dancing in the living room sharing a romantic date night at home, and it also bring back the searing heartbreak of hearing that music playing softly at his funeral, as his American military service flag was presented to me on behalf of a grateful nation.
Not every song reminds me of Moe. Music is used to enhance movie scenes, and in much the same way, certain melodies remind me of why I don't like a particular person, place, or thing, or why I broke off a friendship or dumped an ex-husband, boyfriend, or lover. Some even merit a number of songs, depending on the length of association. For example, two songs remind me of a former flame from Lufkin, Tx. who strung me along for almost ten years before I got fed up with his no count, commitment phobic, old ass. Back then, it was George Strait's Carrying Your Love With Me, because Cal worked construction all over the world, and not only was I head over heels in love with him, I never knew when or where he was going to be from one day to the next. Now days, it's Colder Weather, Zac Brown Band's latest hit, because once again he's calling and wants to take up where we left off twelve years ago. He's still no count, and would put me on the back burner for his convenience if I allowed it... and I'm not making any allowances.
Songs like friendships are oldies but goodies, and every time I hear Janis Joplin wailing Bobby McGee, I think of my lifelong sister-friend, Susanne` and all the crazy adventures we've shared and survived, many of them linked to beers, bon fires, and hot wired hi-jacked jeeps with music blaring from the radio. Amarillo by Morning, and any classic King George, or Garth Brooks and Chris LeDoux bring back my rodeo days, and long, lonesome highways, road-tripping with my girls to the big PRCA shows in Florida and Biloxi. Friends in Low Places puts me right back at the Texas Club drinking with my buddies, two-stepping around the dance floor, living like tomorrow didn't matter, and having fun was all that did.
Music has been, and always will be nourishment for my soul, the balm that soothes, the fuel that feeds the fire that keeps me moving forward. It's the gift I've been given that will forever honor Moe's memory, and has allowed me to become and remain a member of his music family. Lyrics and melodies so often reflect real life, creating the framework for the mental images from our pasts. I have an indelible songbook of sweet memories of Moe, that I will cherish always, but I'm also curious about new music that might portray this new phase of my life. New additions, like ZBB's "Knee Deep"( I need a beach vacay!) or "Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy" (wouldn't be my first rodeo), that will enhance the already vibrant range of compilations that is the album of my life such as Rascall Flatts "Life is a Highway", and Mirand Lambert's "House that Built Me", (thanks mama & daddy) timeless and poignant, " Amazing Grace", and Brad Paisley's "When I Get Where I am Going" (miss you, cuz). Most importantly, after all I've been through and the life lessons I've learned, I have to agree with Mr. Strait... I'm Not Here for a Long Time, I'm Here for a Good Time". Care to join me?
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